The End of a 2 Weeks Saga...

This is suppose to be the continuance from the last posting I posted on the October 15...I took me nearly 2 weeks to post the second parts, as confusion is still filling in my mind...the saga had just ended, since she had just went back to her university about 2 hours ago...however, one thing for sure is, the relationship between us is still in the mist...

Just after my last posting, explaining about my feeling last 2 weeks, one of my friends, which is also my colleague told me that he was not happy with the way she treated me...as he can felt that the same way as I did...He was trying to force me into saying my intention during breakfast with others, but sensing my weird behaviour, he can felt the same way as I did...Later, he told me about his opinion regarding my trouble...from his point of view, the girl that I liked seemed to have more interest towards my other colleague (surprisingly, the one who told her that I had feeling towards her), and the colleague had the same feeling towards her..So, his suggestion was, either I ask the girl directly for an answer, or just give up before I got hurt even worse when I knew the truth..

I had been bothering with such suggestion in the first place...I had the intention to put aside this relationship, since I can sense that it was not going my way...So, why say on to get get hurt..

However, the strange thing is, what I think is completely different from what I do...Though I said that I should give up, I still did those unexplainable thing for her; getting her the cd she wanted, searching for movie she wish to watch, accompanying her for lunch, and to the further extend of travelling to Muar just to get her otak-otak after promising her that I will do so...What will makes a person to do such a crazy act??

Which at last strengthen the myth, "Love is Blind"......most probably love had made me blind in all this aspect...What I did, even though from other point of view is crazy, not worth it, etc.., is important to me, as I really wish to see her happy...

I do know the fact that I might be hurt in the end, if what my friend said was proven to be truth..But sometimes, people might did sometimes, even though they knew that by doing so, they will gt hurt...It is like what other said, "the moth will fly near to the burning candle, even though it might get burned.." Well, I guess that what most of the people felt when they really like somebody...

So, in the end, the decision I had made was to give me another chance to see how thing will developed between she and me, when she comes back in 3 weeks time....If things don't really turn out my way, then I guess the path the lies in front of me will be quite clear...I won't be blaming her if such thing happened, as the is no right or wrong in love...

Wish her all the best in her final next week....

Unexplainable Feelings Nowdays

For the past 2 months, lots of things had gone around me, which makes me a bit weird in my feeling....It is really funny for me to say such words, but I just felt that I am not the person I used to be compared to the past.....

It all changed on the 22 of September, when I finally plucked my courage to told her about my feeling. Well, it was not really a surprising thing, for both of us, since before hand, she had already know about my feeling towards her. Reasons?? One of my colleagues had told her about that. However, I finally let her know my feeling towrads her with my own voice on the very special day. The answer I got, wwas only 4 words, "shun qi zhi ran". In other words, let it be natural....I related this answer to my friends, and he encourage me to go ahead with my courting, since it was a good sign when a girl reply in such a way...

However, the funny things that I felt was rather unexplainable.. Comparing with my other colleagues, she seems to be more happy when with them, more things to talk, willing to get close to them, rather than me....Often, I was the one who messaged her, comparing to the fact that she used to message my other colleague...I am getting confuse with the way she reacted to me.. Was she trying to hint to me that I should give up? Or is it just normal for a girl to treat a guy which had already confess to her in such a manner...?? I don't really know..

One thing that I know is, I really care about her, and willing to go miles just to help her whenever she was in need..Knowing that she need informations for her assignment, I was willing to help her to look for it...She is not happy with her test results, and I am there to confort her..Found out that her battery for her cellphone is not in the good condition, I bought her one and gave it to her...She ask for my help to seacrh for a CD, and I skipped my lunch to help her to look for it.....Sound crazy??

However, the feeling is still in my heart about the way she treated me...Am I too sensitive?? Or shall I just need a direct answer from her...?? Perhaps I should give up on this relationship....Getting more and more confuse now..

I really need some guidance....If there is a light to show me the path I should take, please show it to me....